Through my training in occupational therapy I grew to understand the therapeutic value of 'activities.' Much of my work in the field has involved helping people engage in activities that add value and meaning to life. Facilitating those experiences brought me great joy. The variety of activities I was able to develop stimulated me professionally and provided ample opportunity to be creative and resourceful. I've been out of that work for a while now and I've had time to reflect on something.
While I rejoiced in creating fun activities for others, I almost never created those opportunities for myself. But now I'm charting a new course. Knitting is my new therapy. It's a gift I'm giving to myself - long overdue.
Over and over I meet the twelve year-old girl in me. She shows up in the irritation and impatience I feel when I make a mistake. Adult me models calm, steady problem-solving for my wounded inner child. It is extraordinary to witness. The parts of me that were certain forgiveness was a forbidden realm are softening. I can almost feel her leaning, sometimes, against my chest. She trusts me.
Through knitting I am rebuilding trust in myself. I get to reconfigure my responses to the world around me. I never asked questions. I accepted what I was given - took what life served - ever in reaction mode. I get to change that.
Today when I was trying to decide what to do next, I chose to knit. It helped.
Here is the result:
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